Faith in the process


12/7/19
Today is December 7, 2019; and I do not have a job. I feel less than because of this circumstance. I will do some processing with this circumstance, and see what I can come up with.

Circumstance: Not getting a job
Thoughts: I am unworthy, why taking so long
Feeling: worthless, unable to do for my family
Action: Feeling sorry for myself, thought diarrhea
Result: no forward movement, feeling unworthy, no change

These ideas do not have to stay in my mind. I can change my mind, my thoughts with a flip of a switch. I have had three interviews. Two jobs I did not get. One was 50 minutes one way, so it is good that I did not get that job. And the previous one didn’t seem like a good fit. Today, I had a dream that I worked online, and I was happy. And I got the job I really wanted. It was so real, I could feel the freedom in my work, where I was able to talk to people online or on the phone when I was able to. And I was flexible with my work. Lord, what does that mean. I want this so badly, but is it your will to have me do this also. With tears in my eyes, I ask you for our monetary means to be easy and light. And we believe You for the good You will be giving us. We have been faithful in our giving over the last two years, with offerings as well. And I pray Lord that I can be worthy of getting the work you want me to have. I want so much the work I want. But, Lord, is that work that you want me to have?
This week, I had a massage interview. It was apparent I was not fit for that work. The woman I talked with and I had a good conversation. But I know that is not where I am supposed to be working now. I had an interview with a hospice 50 minutes away. And got the call that they found someone else. Thursday, I had a good phone interview with someone from Ovia Health. I would like that job so much. I have to write a response to a fictional mom for the 2nd part of the interview. I emailed Paige a 2nd time and she gave me a suggestion to make my writing project better. Lord, please guide my words, and help me in my suggestions to moms in this mock 2nd interview. Lord I want that work, I want that skill. I want to work for this company. Yesterday, I made another phone interview with a company in town, Heritage Health. Lord, I need to help with finances. We have $1,800 to spend, only. What will the outcome be? My worry is not helping me think optimistically about my circumstances.
I also needed to get a new headset for my work for Ignite Local. I see how this is scary, but had no problem putting the action to dialing. And next week, Kim is letting me drive with her to and from Bellevue, for the conference. I tried to pay via Paypal, but the fee didn’t go through. So prayerfully, I will find $25 for the cost of the event. Lord, what do You have for me on working these into my everyday life? Calling is $15/hour, with the potential of increases. How long do we have for our everyday bills? I can go to the food pantries in the future. So, food will be available. I am pleading with Your Lord for answers to our concerns. R is looking forward to the gun show next weekend. I pray Lord that all the items he has to sell, that he does. And he profits $1,000 for the weekend. Yes, Lord!

Circumstance: no new job
Thoughts: Lord has good for me in this process
Feelings: Confident
Action: Bolstering my faith in the Lord, not myself. Do my best in the job resumes/interviews
Results: Doing work the Lord is asking me to do, one thing at a time.

The way to faith = Praise, Prayer, Worhsip. Yes Lord!




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